On change, self-belief and moving forward into (a fabulous) 2018 ...
I've been through an incredible amount of change in 2017, and I'm not just talking hair color, though I've been on totally different ends of the spectrum from having the platinum blonde I had always dreamed of, to attempting to get back to my natural chocolate brown and accidentally dying it a terrible shade of jet black. Happens, right? Such is life.
Change is constant, the only constant, and it can be beautiful when you create it to be. Your perspective, your life is up to you.
In truth, I've always loved dying my hair, but this amount of change was a bit extreme for me looking back. I was not patient in letting my roots go out and went a bit crazy with my hair decisions. I have found myself a bit unrested, but I am working on it. Truthfully, I was sporadic in many decisions, unsure of who I was and who I wanted to be in my "new old world." Luckily, I was recently able to fix my hair and make it healthy again thanks to help from the wonderful hairdressers at Shear Chaos. The same can be said about my journey with self-development ...
My hair is softer, healthier and fuller, much like my own character and wellbeing. What a great analogy to start the New Year, right?
As some of you know who have been keeping up with my blog, I'm sure you can tell this year has been a huge one for learning and self-development for me. It was so strange to come back from New York to Wisconsin, only to find myself happier in the place that had previously drown me in boredom as a child, the place I thought I would be lost if I stayed ... but, I live a new truth with wholeness more than I did when I was on my own on the coast for many years.
I now find utmost comfort and security in being close to my family. I am giving up my thoughts of being the person I thought I should, and being the person I want to be, truthfully. No questions asked. No judgment. Only love, peace and happiness.
Let live, then let go -- that is my best piece of advice I can tell you to live by.
Though I still love the high culture, diversity, entertainment and fashion big cities offer, it is my intention to visit these places while I stay close to those whom I love. Having a good support system is truly invaluable. I love my friends and family. I cherish the time I get to spend with them and am grateful I get to do it so often now. I am grateful for their kindness, love, support and unwavering acceptance.
There is progress and regression in many aspects of life. There is good and bad. There is right and wrong. There is humanity and the human condition through these experiences and emotions, that which we are all experiencing at different levels in different ways, but still -- together. We all have the same condition, the human condition, and are running the same race, the human race.
What I have learned is that you will not find balance within until you've done the work with self-development that you need to. You can't compare your journey to others or those you thought you would. You must live in your present and appreciate it for what it is. Take breaks as you need to through your journey. Do not rush. You don't have to. There's no time stamp.
Let yourself heal at your own pace. Let yourself learn at your own pace.
Though you may come to moments where you believe you know and feel assured of yourself, sometimes life surprises you and you get a lot worse before you get "better." (Better is being balanced and peaceful.) Progress is a lifelong process, at different levels throughout segments of your journey. This doesn't mean establishing an end goal to be the best, but your best self, your most whole and well. You need only worry about being happy and healthy in this life -- enjoy your life, please.
Being kind to yourself and patient with your journey are so important. Calmness, inner-peace, relaxation, self love, confidence and happiness are wonderful qualities to genuinely own and embrace. What a joy to have them when you do. What a freeing combination.
Emotional wellness is something you must work at everyday, just like physical wellness. Life is worth the effort. The purpose you have within it is that which you create. The same can be said of happiness, and, of course, your own health is something you must also work at. Loving yourself genuinely, believing in yourself wholly and genuinely, and embracing your uniqueness will be your greatest self-reward. It is not selfish to believe in, accept or love yourself unquestioningly. You owe it to yourself, in fact.
Change your conscious thought to positivity whenever negative arises. Do not feed your monsters. Forward your heroic, brave, confident qualities. Distract yourself with happy and positivity until it becomes you.
Being excited or overly enthusiastic does not exactly mean you are happy. Happiness only comes from inner-peace. Find that balance when you find inner-peace. Make that effort. You will love the ultimate feeling of relaxation and wholeness it brings you. That's the warm hug you need from the inside-out to carry you through, and if anyone has a problem with who you are, they are not worth your time. Don't be sad when you find those people. They'll be the ones to miss out, not you.
Negativity is time wasted. Bad energy is wasted energy. See the reality of people's intentions and treatment of you. Live in your reality. Shape it to your liking. Shape it for your wellness. Teach others how to treat you by the way you treat yourself. Treat yourself well. Treat yourself kindly. Listen to your mind. Believe in your ration. Listen to your body. Be unafraid of change. Be unafraid of vulnerability. Protect yourself. Heal yourself. Fill your soul with warm soup.
Happiness is not something someone else can provide you. Yes, they can supplement it or complement it. But what they are complementing is you, your own happiness, your own wellness, the happiness you give yourself. Create it with carefulness and thoughtful consideration. Always.
And, I beg you -- don't be so hard on yourself. The world is not your responsibility. Learn to let things roll off your shoulders. Some things are not worth the energy of deep thought. Most things aren't.
Embrace the grace of carrying that feeling genuinely and executing it softly. Guide yourself with lightheartedness and feel assured by the notion that things will work out as they're meant to, that nothing is for certain in this world, and that it does not matter what we do, as long as we do something.
All you need to do is be happy and healthy. No pressure. No expectations; only you, being you. How freeing. How wonderful. How beautiful a request ... Find the sparkles in the dirt. Believe your life is amazing. It will become it before you know it.
2018 is going to be fabulous for you and me. I can feel it ... I believe it. Do you?
Comment with one thing you love about yourself.
All my love and support,
Like this post? Read "On Finding Emotional Support Within" next.
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